VIDEO NIGHTS: Mother Goose Rock 'N Rhyme

In case you thought things couldn’t get any more bonkers around Video Nights’ hallowed halls, our latest pick is 96 resplendently shocking minutes of straight-to-video detritus that’ll leave you with a lunch lost and a song in your heart — all populated with an incredible, everyone-but-the-kitchen-sink cast of Hollywood homies. You might ask “What’s the big deal about this benign-looking kids’ TV movie?”, but once you witness this brainbomb, you’ll have many more important questions to ask: how did the makeup artists manage to make the Grinch look pretty? Why does the set look like it was constructed out of old food and misshapen Post-It Notes? Why is everything dizzyingly shot, LSD-style, through a fisheye lens? And who held the gun to the heads of Shelley Duvall, Simon and Garfunkel, ZZ Top, Woody Harrelson, Little Richard, Howie Mandel, Cyndi Lauper, Cheech Marin, Debbie Harry, Bobby Brown, Garry Shandling, The Stray Cats, Katey Sagal, Dweezil Zappa and Pia Zadora to make them all do this?!?! If you saw this as a child, you’re no doubt reading this from a mental institution, because after experiencing this you’ll have nowhere else to go.
Dir. Jeff Stein, 1990, analog presentation, 96 min.

Watch Cinefamily’s original trailer for “Mother Goose Rock ‘N Rhyme”!