MISSISSIPPI: If Footmen Tire You, What Will Horses Do?

One of the all-time slices of mindflaying vintage Christploitation, buoyed by the distinctive lilt of one of the weirdest Southern evangelicals to which you’ll ever bear witness. Hosted by fire-and-brimstone preacher Rev. Estus Pirkle (yes, that is his real name — he’s the robotic, devolved voice present on Negativand’s infamous track “Christianity Is Stupid”), Footmen’s a redneck rendering of what can and will happen in middle America once the Commies take over — you know, like beheading children that refuse to renounce Christ. When infamous psychotronic filmmaking figure Ron Ormond (Mesa of Lost Women, Girl From Tobacco Road) survived a harrowing plane crash, he became born-again, and kickstarted a zealous devotion to Xtian entertainment — which reached its apex with this fantastical, horrific bit of speculative fiction, one that both blows your mind and saves your soul at the same time. Having terrified generations of Sunday-school pupils into submission, Footmen will righteously tumble you like a grid of Boggle dice. Rare 16mm screening!
Dir. Ron Ormond, 1971, 16mm, 52 min.

Watch Cinefamily’s original trailer for “If Footmen Tire You…”!